Adapting.

Hello. Again.
I have a new entree today and apparently a friend told me that my posts are too lengthy but I love doing it. so why not take your time reading it. (-_-)
Today's entree is pertaining envy and jealousy but I shall live in denial and overwrite it as admire and aspire. Or even inspire.
You decide.
Then again, Its not as interesting. I didn't enjoy posting this up but I suppose I had to do something.
Ma'Kasih lho kalo bisa ambil waktu, reading this post of mine. Gw janji dong, the next post will be more interesting than today's. Aduh...

While I am sitting in front of my PC, smoking and drinking Neslo, I accepted few friends on facebook which happens to be my former secondary school friends.
I was browsing through their photographs and found myself in the midst of cold and stale air, engulfed with loneliness and an unexplained feelings.
Don't ask me why. But seriously, I went like..."aawwweee....what the hell??"

A couple of them are engaged. One is married with kids. One has a kid. All of them have boyfriends.
Get the picture?
I am literally laughing my ass out loud at this point of time not because of their happiness, but because I feel shitty.
On one note which I went.."I don't even have a boyfriend." On another note which I went.." How I envy them.."
But I once told myself, why be envious of other people when I actually have enough for other people to be envious of. nothing is missing.
(Emangnya lg living in denial lho.)
Back then, we were all young, naive and unknown of what lies ahead. Now, years after graduating from high school with all the changes left me in awe.

They have since inspired me not to be engaged in any sort of serious relationship that will be tying me down and restricting me from my dreams (unless he's that.."go for it, baby!" kind of boyfriend.)
Earlier today, a girlfriend was telling me -The good men are taken by the wrong girls. And the wrong kind of men were once taken by me thus, my prayers to steer clear from men like such is still ongoing. (Bener dan gw serius!)

Alhamdulilah. I manage to get the things I needed to buy for this festive season which I am not quite looking forward to. But I am accepting the fact and adapting to vast changes like unexpected things and situation stuffs like that. I told myself, never use sudden changes or the existence of other people as a rebound but use it as an experience. Because I will never know if this experience will make a positive impact in my life. I don't want to end up missing it. Know what I'm saying?
Till then, the first day of Eid, I have to report back at the bar, I'm on duty for the match on 20Th September 2030hours. God Darn It!
Its okay though. The extra income earned is worth one house visit with a lot of Tante-tante girang that will go.."aduh, kapan nih mau Kawin?" or even.." cantik banget lho, udah ada pancaran nya belum?"
Buset aq.

Speaking of which, last night I made a little trip down to Geylang Serai with 2 buddies who watched out for me amongst the crowd and helped a friend find his kain samping which matches his baju kurung. It is not easy. To think I though the ladies would be more fussy than the men, I have proven myself wrong. We kept arguing of which one suits nicer and stuffs like that.
Geeez...
Bumped into many friends, some of those whom I 'threw away' back then, some of those whom I don not even remembered their names. Some of those I knew since I was little. Wow. I didn't know the world outside is much more fun than just living with yourself. somehow...

" I saw you with your new girl. See that you're doing good. I'm happy for you. I hope she flabbergast you more than I did. She had no make-up on, bet she did.
I bet she did.."

Xx